See one, do one, teach one

Shelby is probably the most risk-taking grandchild among our 11 grandchildren. Her dad often says that she is a daredevil, but I am not sure I like anyone using any word that has devil in it to describe one of my grandchildren. So, let's just say that she is extraordinarily daring. 

Sometimes when she is with me she watches me doing something on the farm, and then after I have finished, she says, "Now, I want to do it, Papa." I will usually let her do it--well, not everything. I haven't let any of my grandchildren run the bush hog.

When I began to learn the More' language in Burkina Faso, I enjoyed learning some of the proverbs from the Mossi culture. One of the proverbs says, "See one, do one, teach one."

I still love this proverb, and all my kids have heard me use it many times. For the past 30 years this proverb has helped me be a better leader. I have had challenges in my career thinking that it is easier for me to just go ahead and do something rather than allowing someone else to do it. After all, I can do this task better and faster than anyone else. Then I think about that proverb.

A leader helps those with whom he/she works be successful. One way of accomplishing that goal is to show someone how to do something by modeling it, then allow them to do it--even if they can't do it as well as you. Then, they are ready to show someone else how to do it. That's multiplication of leaders!

Sabbath

I believe in the Ten Commandments, and I also believe that they are foundational in our Judeo-Christian beliefs and legal system. I had to get that all straight before I launch into this one.

Occasionally my wife tells me that I should honor the Sabbath and rest. The fourth commandment is clear and dear to me and says that I should honor God by resting on the Sabbath. I do not ever want to hurt my witness with someone saying that I am dishonoring God, but I have an interpretation of what constitutes rest that may be different than others. Cheryl thinks of rest as napping, reading, lounging around, etc. I don’t like naps; I don’t like to sit inside and just stare outside. I like to be outside. I think of rest as working outside—tending to my animals or garden or pasture. I get great pleasure in working with God’s creations and God’s good earth. Working outside is like therapy to me. When I am caring for my animals or caring for our garden or even driving the tractor, I don’t consider any of that as work.

Anyone who knows my mom and dad understands me better. My parents are still going strong—or at least I think it is strong for their age. They embedded a strong work ethic in me. They picked butterbeans in their garden right beside Cheryl and me during a recent visit. As I worked my way through the bean patch, my back was hurting and I was on my knees most of the time, but I knew better than to complain.  My mom and dad were right in there with us.

The challenge for me comes with the definition of rest and of work. I agree that most everyone would define it just as Cheryl would—refraining from anything that smells like work. Rest can mean a lot of things: a rhythmic silence in music, what a column does on a foundation, sleep, stopping all activity that causes exertion, what farmland does when no crop is planted on it, etc.

I think of rest as a time of recovering strength. It would seem strange if you saw me sweating while doing some of my “resting.” My time outside is a refreshing of my mind, body and soul. Some of my best quiet times with God are when I am “working” on the farm.

This afternoon I picked peas from our garden. I sweated something fierce. It started raining, and I did not stop. I was soaking wet with sweat and rain, but I continued to pick—and I loved it. Was it work? Maybe for some people, but for me it was perspiration therapy. I brought the peas up to the house and I invited three granddaughters to help me shell them. For an hour we talked and shelled peas. No TV was on and the only entertainment was us talking with each other and telling stories about things we have done together this summer. Was it work? Not for me and I don’t think it was for the girls either. It was fun!

Now there are some chores on our hobby farm that I definitely consider work—mowing grass and running the weed trimmer. I don’t do things like that on Sunday as I consider that work. Picking blueberries or feeding my goats – that’s not work for me.

Cheryl and I have just spent a week of vacation with two grandchildren at a Christian Dude Ranch in Colorado. I left my computer at home. Several of the guests asked me for a business card, but I did not take any with me. I had a Sabbath Week. For the first time in years I read an entire novel in one week. I relaxed, but I admit that I thought about all that email that was piling up in my inbox. It is now late Sunday evening, and I am typing on my computer. I want desperately to work on some of that email, but I am trying hard not to “work.” Can it wait until tomorrow morning? Yes, but it will be a very hard Monday. As bad as I want to do email, I am not going to do so because I feel convicted that would be work and it would not be a good example for my colleagues.

As I have been typing, the sun has set. The Sabbath is over. So, should I do that email?!?

Pet peeves

Do you have a pet peeve? I do. Some of them make me sound so paranoid that I won’t admit them in this post. As a matter of fact, as I share one of my pet peeves, some of you will probably think, “So, that was so paranoid, wonder ‘bout the ones he did not share.”

OK, so here is one: a church bulletin or a printed program (wedding, funeral, graduation, etc) that lists a certain Winthrop Luper on program along with Elmira Dothan, Dr. Bartholomew Pierce, and Samuel Hogan. Notice anything wrong? One person has a title while the others do not. Now that probably does not bother many of you, but it really bothers me.

Everyone is equally important, so everyone should be treated in the same manner: If you are going to give one person in the program a title, then you must give titles to all of them. Makes sense to me!

I think the worst offenders of this are churches, and I will go so far to say that too many pastors are very proud to boast of their “doctorate” before or after their names. Our pastor asks to be called “Pastor David,” not Dr. (last name). I like that.

Everybody doesn’t have a bold title like “Doctor” or “Professor,” but everyone has the distinction of being a creation of God. Every person’s face into which we have ever gazed is one made in the image of God. Particularly as I travel I look into faces many days thinking, Wow! God made that face! It is absolutely amazing that apart from identical twins, no two faces are exactly the same. Even those people who do very nasty things in our world are ones who the Heavenly Father loves just like you and me. God doesn’t show partiality for the way faces look.

My responsibility is clear: to love the Lord my God with all my heart and to love my neighbor (ALL those faces) as I love myself. Nuff said.

Job

I have been in a drought with posting on this blog. I have even felt guilty for not writing, but I have been determined not to force myself to write. Even if there is no one out there reading this I need to write for myself—for broadening my heart and my mind.

I compose a lot of blogs that don’t make it onto the computer screen—most of them while working outside on the farm, in the shower or driving. Even though they don’t make it to a written state, they are still good for the stretching I need.

In Sunday School class we have been studying Job. I wasn’t really looking forward to this study but I have surprisingly enjoyed it. I have learned a lot of good lessons from studying Job.

Right off the bat we find that when someone experiences tragedy, sometimes the best thing we can do is just to be present. Job’s three friends responded. They came to minister to Job. We learn from them that it is not necessary to say a lot, but being there for a loved one or friend is very important. Some of the best bonding that I have had with some friends was when I was just there for them during a crisis. I did not really DO much at all. I was just there. Some of the biggest mistakes that I have made were when I decided not to be there for someone because I was too busy or I did not think it was important.

Another lesson learned is that I can talk too much. Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar did well with their first assignment to just be there, but then, later in the story, they talked too much. I mean after you tell a guy what a horrible person he is for hiding sin that he knows he did not commit, and you keep sending the same message over and over---that’s an overload.

Have you ever talked about something—or someone—so much that you suddenly realized that you have over talked? Been there and it is hard to get out gracefully.

Finally, Job’s three friends spoke with authority, but they were not always speaking the truth. They falsely accused Job. Ordinarily I am bold in talking with people, and I don’t mind confrontation if it is healthy and helps both parties to grow.  But I couldn’t have done what E, B and Z did. They left themselves wide open for rebuttals from Job because he knew that they were not telling the truth. They spoke with authority, but not truth. Proverbs 12:17 states, “Whoever speaks the truth gives honest evidence, but a false witness utters deceit.”

I think that E, B and Z may have needed a dose of our New Testament teaching in Matthew 7:1-5 about criticizing others while not examining our own lives. E, B and Z should have been concerned about calling attention to their friend’s sins when they may not have had their own heart right with the Lord. Amazing how easy it is to see other people’s faults!

Turtle

Today is a holiday and Cheryl and I have been working outside. She ran the weedeater and I pushed the mower along the fences. I really don’t like to mow grass—duh! Who does? It is not so bad when all our equipment is working properly, but our riding lawnmower is waiting to be repaired, so I have to use the push mower while it is out of commission.

I was praying and pushing this morning, and I stopped instantly when I saw a turtle stuck in the fence. Some people call this type of wire “range fencing” or some people call it “hog wire.” It has small rectangular panels and the rather large turtle was lodged in one of the rectangular panels that was even with the ground. The turtle was dead. It had apparently been trying with all its might to move forward, but it was impossible because its body was wider than the clearing in the wire. Interestingly enough, if the turtle had just walked backwards it might have saved itself.

As I continued to push the mower I thought about that dead turtle. If he had only stopped trying to push itself through the fence and used a small amount of energy to go backwards, it might have backed out of the fence and lived another day.

I decided that I am a lot like that turtle. My ability to move fast and bring a task to completion is sometimes an asset. I totally get the part about moving forward and not looking back. Once I make up my mind to buy something, I am not one of those persons who search around to see if he gets the best buy. I research, I make a decision, I buy and never compare again.

I know all the scriptures about moving forward and not dwelling on the past (Isaiah 43:18-19, Philippians 3:12-14, 2 Corinthians 5:17, and others). But my inclination to move forward fast can be a liability. This is what the turtle taught me: I tend to move so fast that I don’t take time to think about the process. Like the turtle I am working so hard to move forward that I don’t even think about the predicament, much less about taking a step backward. I get caught up in the moving forward so much that I do so at all costs. Thank you, Lord, for reminding me to remember the situation, remember the process, and remember not to move forward too fast.

Details

The story is told of three men who were sentenced to die by the guillotine. There was a pastor, a lawyer and an engineer. Each of them had an opportunity to say something before their execution. The pastor raised his hands and said, “May God have mercy on us all.” The executioner moved him into position for his execution. As the guillotine came down it abruptly stopped just before severing the pastor’s head from his body. The pastor was set free.

The lawyer stepped up and cried out to the crowd, “Justice for all.” The blade of the guillotine again stopped just before falling on his neck. The lawyer was also allowed to go free.

The engineer stepped up for his last words and said, “If you would just tighten those two bolts on the right side then this contraption would work perfectly!”

I am in India working with business men and women who want their businesses to make a difference for the Kingdom. I was asked to give a devotional this morning at the beginning of the day. I talked about some rules for living, and one of the points that I made was to pay attention to detail. Jesus paid attention to detail: in Mark 5:25-34, a woman who had a hemorrhage was in the crowd. She worked hard to get near Jesus, and she touched Jesus’ garment. Jesus turned and said “Who touched my garment?” Jesus paid attention to detail.

I probably pay more attention to details than the average person. My wife would probably tell you that I only pay attention to things that need to be done in the house: “Honey, did you see that cobweb in the corner?” or “Wow, the pollen has really covered things in the house.” Yes, those type comments usually get me in hot water.

When someone asks me to read something for feedback they usually mean for me to look at content or theme concerns. However, when I read it I cannot help but edit the document (if it is not terribly written—I have actually told some people that I can’t read the document until it is written in a more intelligible manner).

Maybe I am a bit overboard with details, but I learn a lot paying attention to details. I believe that it is usually necessary to pay attention to details to achieve excellence.

God is all about details. If you don’t believe it, sit down in a public place where there are a lot of people moving past you and start studying peoples’ faces. You will not see two people with the same features. That does not seem so awesome unless you are where I am now. I have been doing a lot of walking in Bangalore—fighting jet lag as I was in Kyrgyzstan for a week, then back in Georgia for four days, then back to Asia. Yes, that is crazy, but necessary to fulfill my commitments.

There are well over a billion people in India and only 8 million of them live in this city. I think all of them are on the streets at 5 pm as that is the time that I have been walking the past two days. I am telling you it amazes me to look into the faces of all these Indians and not see any two who look alike. God is in the details! He made all of us in his image, but He made all of us to look different from the other and the amazing thing is that there are not a lot of square inches on a human’s face. I mean, there is only so many things you can do with a chin, right?!

Celebrate! We are all alike in the image of God, but we are all different to our human eyes. God is all about the details.

Listening and hearing

Cheryl had been telling me that my hearing was not good. I thought I was hearing very well, but after she continued to mention my diminished hearing capacity, I decided to get a hearing test.

During my annual physical I asked the nurse if they did hearing tests and she said I would have to go to a special lab for a hearing test. So, I made an appointment for the hearing exam. The young lady administered the test, and I responded to the commands. When we had finished, I impatiently waited for the results.

She soon came to me with a report. She said, “Mr. Cox, you have perfect hearing.” I couldn’t believe it, and I could hardly wait to get home to tell Cheryl.

Arriving at home I proudly announced to Cheryl that I had my hearing test that day and I said to her: “Guess what! I have perfect hearing.” In a blink Cheryl responded to me, “Then, there is something wrong with your listening!”

Ouch! That hurt. I walked directly into that.

Listen and hear—two very common English words that we use every day. Defining one of these terms is often done by using the other. So, what is the difference in listening and hearing? I can make a case for either in the “which comes first” argument, but I like the difference that Solomon stated in 2 Chronicles 6.

In chapter 5, Solomon and his followers had just finished their great work on the temple and the elders had brought the Ark of the Covenant into the temple. Solomon addressed his people in chapter 6. He declares the glory of the Lord and how the promise God made to his father, David, had been fulfilled with the construction of the temple. This is the prayer of dedication of the house built for God.

I am struck by the message in verses 19-21: “Yet have regard to the prayer of your servant and to his plea, O Lord my God, listening to the cry and to the prayer that your servant prays before you, ²⁰ that your eyes may be open day and night toward this house, the place where you have promised to set your name, that you may listen to the prayer that your servant offers toward this place. ²¹ And listen to the pleas of your servant and of your people Israel, when they pray toward this place. And listen from heaven your dwelling place, and when you hear, forgive.”

Solomon is addressing God, no less, saying that God listens to the pleas of His servant and His people, and when He hears, He forgives His people. I am sure that there is a lot of theology here that we could debate, but the important thing in reading and meditating on scripture is what we get out of it that makes us a better servant and follower of God. So, here’s what I get that helps me: we do a lot of listening, but not a lot of hearing takes place. How many times has this happened to you: someone says, “Did you hear that?” And our response is “I was not listening.” Lord, as I am listening to the sounds of this day, may I hear You speaking to me. May I listen to my loved ones, friends and colleagues so that I may hear their hearts with mine.”