COVID 1960

I saw an article entitled something like “What If This Had Happened in 2005.” All the news these days is about COVID-19, and I decided two weeks ago that I will limit my exposure to the news during this crisis. I turned on the TV news a couple times over the last few days, but the news media producers and writers are having to “scratch the bottom of the barrel” to maintain their Nielsen ratings. It seemed to me that some of the people they are interviewing really don’t know much about what is going on except what they are also reading on the web, so I have decided to just stick with picking and choosing what I want to digest from my internet news feeds.

That article made me start thinking—OK, I admit that I was in the shower where I generate a lot of thoughts and receive some of my inspiration for cogitating later on. I wasn’t thinking about 2005, but about what if this had happened sixty years ago. 

In 1960 my maternal grandmother did not have running water in the house, much less a telephone. She had electricity thanks to government programs subsidizing rural electric cooperatives. She had an electric “ice box”, but she had no TV. One light bulb hung from the ceiling of each of the four rooms in her primitive farmhouse. 

A Coronavirus probably would not have reached my grandmother’s homestead. But we lived in the big city—population around 20,000! We had all the modern conveniences, and we even had a television. My parents received the local newspaper and still listened to the radio for local news and gossip. I didn’t know anyone who had traveled to another country except some uncles who had served in the military. Our world was small and our lives provincial. 

If there had been a Coronavirus during 1960, and a stay-at-home order had been issued, we would not have had deliveries to our home from internet orders, but we might have had deliveries from the grocery store. Lysol and Clorox were around but not in the handy-wipe versions. Vinyl gloves were not available to the public, nor were face masks. No fast food restaurants, much less drive-throughs for food or pharmacies or banking. There was no technology that would have allowed us to contact my grandmother who lived 30 miles away. 

Are we blessed during this Coronavirus? Yes, indeed. First of all we are blessed to have good health. We are blessed to be so prepared for such a crisis. How blessed we are to have technology that allows Cheryl and me to see our families on our devices. How blessed we were to celebrate Easter today with our church family via FaceBook live. Thank you, Lord, for the grace and joy we have in You that sustains us during crises in our lives. 

It’s Easter! Rejoice and give thanks for all our blessings!

Chosen family

I grew up with my family in Mississippi—my dad and mom and two younger brothers. Bubba is five years younger than I, and Danny is 15 years younger. I left home for college at 17, and I did not turn 18 until I had finished my first semester of college. I did not get to know Danny other than as a baby—all I remember is having to change his diapers!

The five of us were a tight family who spent a lot of time together. My mom had 11 brothers and sisters. Three of her brothers lived in Texas with their families and two other brothers were divorced, so long distances and split families meant that I did not get to know some of my cousins. I don’t really know to this day how many first cousins I have.

My dad had only two younger sisters and they lived with their families in the same town where I grew up, so we spent a lot of time with them—especially on holidays. 

Of course, our church family was an important part of our lives, too. My grandad and grandmother went to the same church as we did.

My immediate family has remained close even though we lived overseas for many years, but we could always pick up right where we left off. We all have a natural family with whom we share the same lineage.

When I left home at 17, I never lived there again as I went to college or worked away from home every summer during college. Cheryl and I started making friends together in our early college years and today my best friend from college and his wife remain very close friends. We have enjoyed vacationing together over the past 30+ years. Our kids call them “uncle” and “aunt.” 

A seminary friend and I were called to the same church in Florida on  the same day. We have been friends of this couple for 48 years. They called us this week just to catch up on us.(Hasn’t it been great how we have all been checking on one another during this crisis!) 

So many missionary colleagues have been part of our larger family over the past 45 years. Our kids have many, many aunts and uncles with whom we have served on three continents. We enjoy getting together each year with some special former missionary colleagues. We meet in our home, and we all look forward to that time of just talking and eating and talking and eating. This past weekend was scheduled to be our annual get together time. Of course we could not meet, so we did the next best thing—we spent Saturday morning together with the help of that rising company called Zoom. The girls were on one call and the guys on another. It wasn’t as good as being in person, but it was a sweet time! 

Cheryl and I have come to call many of these relationships outside our natural families our chosen family. During different seasons of our lives we have had many people in our chosen family. Living in different parts of the world we have not had any of our natural family near us. So we have chosen others to be our family, and in many cases, these are people we love as much as our natural family.

Thank you, Lord, for our natural families, and for allowing us to have a chosen family. 

Do you know the song that goes like this:

I’m so glad I’m a part of the family of God.

I’ve been washed in the fountain, cleansed by His blood.

Joint heirs with Jesus as we travel this sod.

I’m a part of the family. The family of God

Windows

In all this Coronavirus mess I am hearing of friends and family who are so stressed. Granted, it is a time to be cautious and above all intelligent about staying healthy.

We are so accustomed to fast-paced living and operating from a full calendar, but now most people are working from home these days. That can certainly lead to even more stress and anxiety in the household. 

Cheryl and I are blessed to live on a small farm. We live on the side of a hill—they call them mountains in north Georgia—and out of every window we see the handiwork of God. During the last couple of weeks I have enjoyed more than ever looking out those windows. I marvel at the new growth on the trees, the farm animals grazing new grass, and the return of the hummingbirds. This virus has not affected all these beautiful creations one little bit. 

You might not live in a setting as we do where we can’t see our closest neighbors’ houses. Even if you live in a high rise building in the city you can still spend time alone with the Lord looking out a window at all of His creation. 

Maybe one of the messages that the Lord is sending us through this crisis is that we need to look out our windows and allow Him to speak to our hearts in quietness and solitude. 

1 Peter 5:6,7 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Getting stronger

I just realized that I have not reported on my health condition in a while.  

My last “full” treatment was on March 12. As I have mentioned in a previous post the proton machine was inoperable for several days, so my treatments did not resume until March 18. I was scheduled to have 30 full treatments, and then the last three were to be smaller treatments called boosts. They were of shorter duration and gave me only two blasts of protons where I normally had three blasts. 

Since the last three were lighter treatments, I really did not have any more full blasts after March 12, so I have had over two weeks to begin the healing process.

I was thrilled when the mouth sores abated and I could enjoy eating once again. It had a been a chore to chew and to even talk at times during my treatment. During this past week the big glob in my throat has diminished, and some of my taste buds have returned, so I am enjoying tasting food once again. 

During the treatments I had to maintain the same weight as when they measured me for my mask and did the scans to set up the doses of protons. I had a surgery in November, then it was Thanksgiving. I had a surgery in December and then it was Christmas time. And all during these recovery times I was not getting any exercise, so I gained 10+ pounds. I was planning on getting it off as soon as the holidays and my recovery period was over, but then, alas, the medical team told me not to lose any weight. All this to say that I am no longer having milk shakes or ice cream every day, and I hope to lose that weight soon. 

My energy level is improving each day, and I am enjoying taking on some chores on the farm that have been neglected for the past five months. 

Since my immune system has been compromised Cheryl and I have refrained from seeing any people—including family members, much to my disappointment.

The next step is to have a follow up visit with my surgeon, but I am not in a hurry to see him while all this virus mess is still brewing. My radiation oncologist’s office will be scheduling another PET scan in June.

I am grateful to you who are reading this blog and so many others around the world for your prayer support and encouragement over the past five months. Thank you! 

Hearing and listening

When Emma, one of our twelve granddaughters, was in kindergarten she was the only child in her class who could tie their shoes. Her teacher was very impressed, and she asked Emma, “Who taught you how to tie your shoes?” Emma quickly responded, “I just taught myself.” There was nothing unusual about that conversation, but later Emma said to her teacher, “I taught myself to talk!”

Over the years I have whispered “papa” in the ears of our grandchildren beginning in their infancy, and many of them have whispered “papa” as one of their first words.

Tonight, we were on FaceTime visiting with Allison and Will’s children. Pete is 17 months old, and it seems he understands everything—OK, most everything—but he is not talking yet. I was drilling Pete whispering “papa” over and over but to no avail. Cheryl even tried getting him to say “papa”—I think just so I would stop trying to bug the boy every time we get on a video visit.

Most parents are eager to hear their child start talking. However, many parents are not too concerned about what their children hear in their home.

A few years ago, Cheryl told me numerous times that I could not hear well. I disagreed with her—imagine that—but in the end I decided to do something about my hearing. I was just completing my annual physical and I asked the nurse if they had the capacity to give me a hearing test in their office. She said that they did and showed me to a very small room where they did hearing tests.

When I finished the hearing test, I was anxious to know the results, so I asked her how I did. She replied, “Mr. Cox, you have perfect hearing.” I said, “Can you repeat that?” Well, I didn’t really ask her that, but it is funny anyway. I did tell her that I could not wait to get home to tell my wife.

Upon arriving home, I told Cheryl, “Guess what I had done at the doctor’s office today? I had a hearing test, and the nurse told me I had perfect hearing!”

In an instant, Cheryl replied, “Then something is wrong with your listening!” She got me…

It is true that we don’t listen to everything that we hear. Hearing is one of the five senses, and we hear many things that we don’t understand. Listening is a communication technique that lets us understand, interpret and put meaning to what we hear.

I don’t know how many times when our kids were growing up that I would ask them, “Did you hear what I said?” If I was as smart as I am now, I should have asked them, “Did you listen to what I said?”

Kids of all ages are hearing everything and listening to most of what we say.

Lord may all our words be kind so that when others are listening, our words will be pleasing to You and edifying for those around us.  

Encourage

What a time we live in! Who would have dreamed two months ago that a submicroscopic infectious agent that can only replicate inside a living cell of an organism would turn the world upside down? 

Some of you are hunkered down with family members, but Cheryl and I are unable to have anyone in our home at this time because my immune system has been compromised. 

Yesterday Jeremy and Darby drove up to run some errands for us. They bought feed for the animals and a few grocery items. It was so hard not to hug them or get close to them. We did virtual hugs, but that did not help the heartache of not being able to touch them. 

I have not been a fan of social media, but now we are using it more to stay in touch. Cheryl has been on FaceBook for years, but she is one of those who just reads and never responds (so don’t expect to hear from her!). I am a stalker—I look over her shoulder to look at pics of our grandchildren. Most grandkids aren’t into blogs. They want something shorter and more instant gratification. So, recently I set up an Instagram account—again to keep up with grandkids and what is going on in their lives. (LarryCox354) We have a family group set up on the ap called Marco Polo, so we love sending video messages back and forth. You can create silly messages using weird voices. OK. Some of you are thinking that radiation fried Larry’s brain! Remember that we have 15 grandkids so I don’t mind acting like one of the preschoolers. 

FaceTime has been a wonderful tool for many years for our family as we have been so separated by oceans. It would have been so great to have had such technology when we lived in West Africa where our only communication was snail mail, and this was truly the pace of a snail as it took 3 weeks for an air letter (described in a previous blog) to get to us. To help you understand how little technology was available at that time, when we left Burkina Faso in May 1987 I had only seen one personal computer at a USAID office, and our mission office in Ouagadougou had just bought its first fax machine. 

But we have all these wonderful devices and software available now and I believe that God would be pleased with us if we were to use all this technology to encourage one another. This morning I called a few church members just to encourage them. I think it made them feel better and it surely made me feel good. Cheryl called some widows in our church earlier this week. Those were important connections with the family of God. 

While you are encouraging family members and church family, don’t forget to pray for those who are still working to provide electricity, gas and water for us and for those who who are providing other services such waste disposal, transportation of goods, stores which are providing us with food and supplies, and on and on. 

Don’t forget the first responders. Our son-in-law, Jeff, is a firefighter and his twin brother, John, is a police officer here in Rome, Georgia. Jeff is also an EMT so he is the first contact at most emergencies and cannot keep from getting in the face of victims. Pray for these women and men who are keeping us safe. When you have the opportunity, encourage them, buy their meals if they are in the drive-through, take some homemade cookies by the police station or fire hall. 

Times of crisis brings out the best in most people. Encourage one another! 

For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you, that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine. - Romans 1:11-12 

Ringing the bell

What is your favorite season? Mine is autumn. Seasons are predictable in that we know about when they will begin and when they will end. We know what changes the new season will bring. Right now I am thinking pollen! Spring is beautiful, but the pollen drives my sinuses crazy. 

Life is all about seasons. Some seasons are long and some are short. Some we can’t wait to finish and some we want to last forever. Some are memorable, and some we have forgotten. 

I have just completed a season today. It’s the season of getting fried by proton beams. I must say that I am very pleased with this experience compared to the expected side effects of the regular external beam photon treatments. Regardless of what type of radiation treatment one has, they all are meant to do one thing—kill cells in your body. The proton beams have been laser-focused in a tight area to kill potential carcinogenic cells near my sub-mandibular salivary gland. 

Granted I have had some side effects—loss of taste buds, mouth sores, difficulty swallowing and a big glob stuck in the back of my throat all the time—but these are all part of this season. They too will end with the passing of this season.

I completed my 33 treatments today. At the Emory Proton Center when a patient completes their treatment, they have a small ceremony concluded by the patient ringing the brass bell prominently hung on the wall in the lobby (see photo on Instagram: LarryCox354). Ringing the bell symbolizes the completion of treatment, but it also symbolizes hope for the patient that their life will return to their normal and that they will be cancer free. 

As some of you readers have experienced in your own life, one is not pronounced cancer free right away. It varies with each type of cancer and with each person. When I was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2011, I was treated with proton therapy in Jacksonville, Florida in April and May of 2012, and I had the opportunity to ring the bell at the University of Florida Proton Therapy Institute. However, it was only in 2018 that I was able to get my radiation oncologist to nod his head when I asked him, “So, can I say that I am cancer-free now?” 

Don’t you wish that we could all have a brass bell that we could ring when we are ready for a season to end. But we are not in control of life’s seasons. The Bible says, “He made the moon to mark the seasons; the sun knows its time for setting.”  - Psalm 104:19

We often read and quote this familiar passage of scripture: 

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven” - Ecclesiastes 3:1

But the real message is on down in verse 12:

“I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live”- Ecclesiastes 3:12

God intends for us to live life at its fullness in every season—even in this Covid-19 season! Stop complaining about what we can’t do and start living life at its fullness every second of every day. Jesus died that we may have life—and have it more abundantly. Do good! Be kind! Give praise!